vamps

http://trailers.apple.com/trailers/independent/suck/


i almost put on an attitude and was going to say, "what the hell?!!! ANOTHER vampire movie?!?"
HOWEVER- this looks like we're back on track with the vampire genre. no more steamy stares and glistening abs. this will be terrifying and totally kick ass. as far as i can tell, there's going to be a bunch of rockers who happen to be vamps. i'm guessing the plot is similar to the pick of destiny- attributing the musicians popularity to their vampirism.


speaking of vampires...
http://trailers.apple.com/trailers/independent/letmein/


here is the american remake of the swedish adaptaion of "let the right one in." seriously...the sweeds know what they're doing; they can produce good films. we need to learn that they don't always have to be redone *cough*girlwithdragontatoo*cough*
the title was even changed because our good ole buddies in hollywood thought the it was too long. i know those two extra words would definitely make me think too hard, almost enough to make me realize this will not be that great of a flick. i may change my mind...the little girl from kick-ass stars as our vamp and she really can bring it.


http://trailers.apple.com/trailers/fox_searchlight/blackswan/

another dark film to the pile. i don't know what to think of this. of the three films i'm featuring, this seems the freakiest (and not a vamp in sight...huh.) the trailer reels you in, coming off as a regular film about ambitious ballerinas. suddenly it plummets into this dark psychological thriller-drama then it twists and leaves you hanging with the possibility of some supernatural dark swan emerging. neither natalie portman or mila kunis have done roles like this, and it is very exciting to see that they will be very successful. a december release for this film also adds a final twist (or potty boo ray. heh heh) as it does not fit the typical mold for the oscar season. i am expecting great things.

http://trailers.apple.com/trailers/wb/legendoftheguardianstheowlsofgahoole/

THIS.
i saw this trailer when i saw toy story 3, and i have been extremely excited ever since. i really am not interested in the plot or the books the movie is based on....all i care about are those owls and how beautiful they are. i will see this movie in theatres just to see all those creatures on the big screen. owls are one of my favorite animals to draw (and to see and hear, for that matter) and i only wish i could have been part of this animation team. why couldn't warner brothers waited just a few more years and i would have happily worked on this movie for them. how inconsiderate of WB not to think of me.

http://trailers.apple.com/trailers/universal/repomen/

sooo... this film. "repo men." you get an organ transplant. a nice expensive organ. but if you cannot pay your bill in time, a repo man (jude law) comes and takes back the organ.
sound familiar?



i thought maybe 'repo men' was supposed to be a remake. but then i thought, why would you remake a movie and take out the singing? it doesn't work that way. adding music enhances an already pleasant experience and makes it kick ass (see: wizard of oz...and i don't mean with led zeplin. i meant with kristin chenoweth and a little gravity-defying).
after some digging, turns out this is not a remake....but a rip off an original film by universal.
no matter how much i like the concept of a organ repo man, i could never enjoy this film without thinking of the genetic opera.

plus, repo men does not involve paris hilton's face falling off.

AND...i didn't even mention the rip off of the title from the '84 film


to summarize, i am pissed about this film

back after this

not sure what i'm doing with this anymore. i still watch trailers all the time, and i start to write about them, but then i become too lazy to write more than two sentences. which is probably why i failed at the blog anyway.

i'm going to start writing a regular blog thing, and because the url is so awesome for this one, i'm not creating a new title. maybe i'll put in a trailer here and there.

i had a blologna sandwich with chips and ginger ale today. served on a paper plate, i feel like i'm 7 years old on a summer day. sadly, reality hits me when i look at the other side of the variety luch meat package, and notice that for bologna, 140/160 calories are from fat. i'm suprised i didn't have a heart attack on the spot. good thing i only eat a bologna sandwich every two years or so. however not wanting to waste food, i'll somehow have to get through the other 4 slices in the package. goodbye, potential skinny jeans. it was worth it.


apparently i can't go more than paragraph without talking about movie trailers, because i just watched the macgruber one and i have some thoughts.
http://www.apple.com/trailers/universal/macgruber/

the best part about the macgruber skits was that they were short, and the punch line was the explosion at the end. how can you stretch this into a movie? snl has a hard time spinning things into films...wayne's world turned out awesome, and coneheads did ok... but then superstar, night at the roxbury, and ladies man all fell on their face. sometimes things are better as sketches.


http://www.apple.com/trailers/lions_gate/kickass/

fuckin a', man. this is the kind of superhero stuff i like. nothing too fancy, but totally kick ass (slight pun intended). i hope someone will go with me when we're in london. good move, nick cage. this should help pay your mortgage.

http://www.apple.com/trailers/magnolia/theeclipse/

i didn't even watch this one, but i just saw the title and thought, "uh, oh. there's going to be some confusion come november for those twitards"

your lucky number this week is nine

the title of this blog not only is an actual fortune i've received from a cookie, but relates to a common thread in movie titles. five movies (or more) are going to be released involving this ordinary numeral.


http://www.apple.com/trailers/independent/999/

first up, $9.99. although i adore stop-motion animation, i feel it is quite unnecessary for this film. however, it may be the only interesting thing about it. this movie is just reiterating the several movie cliches of finding your place, and doesn't seem to have any appealing bits besides being animated. based on the trailer, i will probably not ever see this movie.


http://www.apple.com/trailers/sony_pictures/district9/

district nine is shot documentary-style about an envasion of what they call 'non-humans.' some of it reminds me of starship troopers or hitchhicker's guide, except this is taking place in the present. check out D-9.com or www.multinationalunited.com - these sites are so real-looking that they almost fooled me if it had not been for the sony pictures copywrite at the bottom. with the cool/freaky websites and peter jackson's name slapped on, this movie definitely creates enough interest to go see.


http://www.apple.com/trailers/weinstein/nine/

entertainment weekly described this trailer as chicago+moulin rouge divided by the olive garden.
i would have to agree. unfortunately, besides being flashy and being jam packed with big names, this trailer fails to bring interest to the film. until a new trailer comes out, the only thing that draws me to nine right now is the possiblility of daniel day lewis sing. other than that, i could go without.


http://www.apple.com/trailers/focus_features/9/

appropriately being released on september 9th of this year, 9 takes the cake for my 'nine' list. jam-packed with action, scary mechanical beings, and friggen elijah wood, this film is a must. i plan to have my mind and socks blown away. i am so pumped. just watch the trailer and you will be too.

http://www.apple.com/trailers/newmarket/thenines/

and to top it all off, the 5th 'nine' movie involves the number 9 haunting ryan reynolds in some sort of freaky, sim world. i have been anticipating the rumored film based off of my favorite computer game, and i really hope this is not that film. the only reason i am afraid that this could be a sims adaptation is the quick shot of several people with multi-coulored diamonds above their heads and then zoom out to people viewing them on a computer monitor. hopefully this is a coincidence, because this movie does not capture the wonderful world of sims at all. putting sims aside, the nines could be a pretty good film. psychological thrillers like this always interest me, because who doesn't like a good jedi mind-fuck, right? this will be one of those movies that you'll have to discuss for about 2 hours after just to figure out what the hell was going on. 1st time director john august has written some very interesting things, not to mention some of my favorite films, so the nines should be quite interesting.

kids in shorts

http://www.apple.com/trailers/wb/shorts/

disclaimer: i don't have anything to say about the actual content of this trailer, i just had to post it because it contains a bunch of look-alike child actors.

in the beginning of the trailer, i thought the movie was going to be one of those where these two people knew eachother when they were little, but they're seperated by an unusual event, then they grow up, and then the fall in love or something....
i could have read the synopsis to find out this will not be one of "those" movies, but i like to be suprised
anyway, my reasoning behind all that was because the little girl looks just like christina ricci did when she was younger, and then the boy looks like he could be justin long.
if that wasn't enough, at the end the kid who has the telephone in his head looks just like the kid from jumanji (the one who gets turned into a monkey). i acutally thought for a moment it was that kid, until i realized he should be older than me right now.

so, movie execs if you're reading, if there WERE to be a movie that needs child actors who grow up later in the film, and you happen to cast justin long and christina ricci, get the kids from shorts to play the younger versions. totally.

anyway, if i was 10...i probably would still not see shorts.

foodstuffs

today's theme: FOOD
no further explanation needed.

http://www.apple.com/trailers/magnolia/foodinc/

last year, i accidentally bought the omnivore's dilemma at the university bookstore. after realizing it was for a different class that i wasn't enrolled, i did not return the book, instead i read it. hands-down the best mistake i have ever made. the movie food, inc, seems to be a sort-of adaptation of that book (considering author michael pollan makes an appearance). this movie will discuss the problems with the industrial food production system and the expanding monoculture in the world. considering the economic crisi, it is difficult to buy ethically-produced vs cheaply-produced, but hopefully through this movie (and books, don't forget about books...i beg of you, read, read, read) people will begin to understand the true costs of a 99 cent burger. i will most definitely see this movie, and i will continue to change my lifestyle to bring its message to life.


http://www.apple.com/trailers/miramax/extract/

changing gears, the trailer for extract reeks of predictability. jason bateman is a middle-aged guy working at some boring factory, and his wife has stopped putting out. OH NOES! BUT THEN, a hot, younger girl gets a temp job at said boring factory. hmmmm, i wonder what will happen? putting the mid-life crisis plot aside, the one thing that intrigues me about this trailer is ben affleck as the hippie bartender/best friend. my friend benny hasn't been making the hits lately, but i know there is a comedic gold mine inside. he will either be the best or wost thing about this movie. mila kunis has been labeled as one to watch as she transitions from the small to big screen (formerly known as kelso's girl in that 70s show), but going by the trailer, her role isn't much bigger than being eye-candy. this is probably a movie i will rent, not see in theatres.